F My life, Need to Vent Feel Like A Failure.?

Jeez man, why didn't you see a doctor? If you still have that problem, I'd see one asap. You should not feel like a failure because you were embarred. You couldn't help yourself. And the girl, so what if she worked for your family and so what if there was an age difference. Love is love. You shouldn't have let her go. I think you should call her and start being her friend again. If you still feel that pain now 3 years later, you still love her.